Sometimes I trick myself into thinking I know shit about cooking because I watch too much Top Chef and Food Network.
Like when the contestants start explaining their dishes and they say “Oh I just whipped up a Five Spiced Curried tabouli with braised steak tenderloins and pickled cilantro risotto with a smoked bacon foam.”
And I’m just like oh shit I know what ALL OF THAT MEANS.
Celebrity Erotica #1: Angelina "Angie" Jolie and Brad Pitt
Brad inserted into Angie hoping to “make love” this time instead of what Angie made them do every time they had sex. She was like a priest at the Vatican when it came to how kinky she was. Brad attempted to change the direction that their sex was going by calling her “Mrs. Pitt;” instead she said She yelled, “SPANK ME WITH THAT DILDO!!!” Brad resigned to their “kinky” sex and grabbed the dildo, but She said, “Not that one, the one shaped like Webster.”